Life unexpected
by Everythingistaken
Summary: Elizabeth and Henry are still trying to wrap their heads around unexpected news when things change drastically and Elizabeth finds herself waking up in the hospital. Suddenly the couple has to cope with a loss of something they didn't even know they loved yet. Set somewhere in season 2.
1. Chapter 1

_I had this idea for a fanfiction in my head for a long time now and I though I'd just give it a try. Please be aware that I am no doctor and most of the knowledge I have about what is ahead in this fanfiction comes from "Dr. Google"._  
 _This was actually supposed to be a One-Shot but I just couldn't stop writing. I think I will add one or two more chapters._

 _English is also not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes._  
 _Now I hope you will enjoy this chapter and take the time to leave me a much appreciated review!_

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Elizabeth turned her alarm off with a groan. The night just hadn't been long enough. She had gotten home around 4am and every bone in her body was telling her right now that three hours of sleep just weren't enough.  
 _"Just today and then there's a free, relaxing weekend ahead",_ Elizabeth told herself when she dragged herself under the shower. When she got in the kitchen with her hair still wet, the kids and Henry were already having a heated discussion about whether chocolate chip or chocolate chip and banana pancakes were the real deal.  
"Good morning", Elizabeth forced herself to smile when she came down the stairs.  
"Morning mom", Stevie, Jason and Allison greeted their mother.  
"Coffee?" Henry asked and was already taking a mug out of a cabin when Elizabeth responded the unimaginable.  
"No, thank you, I think I'll stick with tea today."  
Suddenly all eyes were on her.  
Henry furrowed his brows. He knew that Elizabeth had gotten in late and had thought that what would keep her going today would have to be tons of caffeine, it usually was.  
"You OK?" Allison was the first to ask in disbelieve.  
"Yeah, just a little queasy", Elizabeth fake-smiled.  
Henry tilted his head and watched as his wife filled the water boiler with water for her tea.  
"I'm fine you guys, the world won't stop because I'm skipping my morning coffee once", Elizabeth chuckled and finally her kids continued their discussion.

"Do you have a long day ahead of you?" Henry asked a little later while Elizabeth was putting her makeup on in their bedroom.  
"I don't want to jinx it but no, not really. I have a sign treaty scheduled for later but I'm actually hoping for an early start into a completely free weekend."  
"Fingers crossed", Henry smiled.  
"Yeah, fingers crossed", Elizabeth sighted.  
"Sleep might help with that upset stomach of yours", Henry murmured while lowering himself onto his knees so that he could pull her into a comforting hug. Elizabeth let herself sink into Henry's arms.  
"Yeah, probably. It's been a long week."  
"Or is anything else bothering you?"  
"Stop worrying, Babe", Elizabeth chuckled while still in her husbands embrace, "it's nothing, like you said, I just need to catch up on some sleep."  
"'kay", Henry nodded and placed a gently kiss on Elizabeth's lips.

Over the course of the day Elizabeth started to feel better but she was still glad when she got home just before 6pm and enjoyed having a relaxing dinner with her family and an even more relaxing downtime in front of the TV with her husband and a glass of wine. Her head was resting on a pillow on Henrys lap, her legs stretched out on the couch and it didn't take long before her eyes started to become heavy and for her to fall asleep. Henry smiled down on his wife and had to admit that he felt relieved that she finally got some peace and quiet. It wasn't often that Elizabeth felt off and when she did Henry couldn't stop but worry about her. Gently he took her glasses off and continued to caress his sleeping wife till the end of the movie they had chosen.  
When it was over and Henry turned the TV off, Elizabeth woke up.  
"Is it over already?" she asked drowsy.  
"Yeah", Henry chuckled, "you slept through most of it. Are you feeling better?"  
"Yes, so much better", Elizabeth sighed.  
"I'm glad. I was a bit worried about you today."  
"I know. And though I could tell you that there was no need to worry but I know that you will see it differently so I just won't", Elizabeth smiled and sat up. Henry put an arm around her shoulders and squeezed her gently while she rested her head on his chest.  
"True", he said, "come on, lets go upstairs."

The McCords spent the weekend as a normal family and Elizabeth enjoyed every minute of it. Though she wasn't feeling 100% like herself, she kept quiet about it so that nobody would worry since she was sure that she just needed a couple of hours of sleep in her system and everything would go back to normal.  
It was in the middle of the next week when she was woken up by a strong wave of nausea that sent her running to the bathroom. It didn't take long until she felt the hands of her husband holding back her hair with one hand and stroking soothing circles on her back with the other.  
"OK?" Henry asked after a few moments and Elizabeth nodded. Henry got up and held out a hand which Elizabeth took gratefully and got up on her feet a little wobbly. She rinsed out her mouth and then rested her hands on the vanity.  
"Babe", Henry sighted while stroking over her back.  
"I just need a minute."  
"You wanna go back to bed for a little?"  
Elizabeth shook her head: "No, I have a meeting in an hour and a half, I need to get ready."  
"Are you sure you're up for it?"  
"Yeah, I feel better."  
"Don't you think it might be a good time for a doctor appointment? You haven't felt well for days now."  
Elizabeth tilted her head and Henry smiled faintly: "I know when you put on a show when you think you need to protect us from something."  
"Can't keep anything from you, can I?" Elizabeth chuckled.  
"And you shouldn't feel like you have to", Henry replied.  
"I know, I'm sorry. I thought this would pass faster."  
"So, you are going to see a doctor?"  
"Not today but I promise, if it gets worse I'll squeeze it in", Elizabeth answered diplomatically and Henry was fully aware that she was saying that to shut him of and didn't actually plan on seeing a doctor. As long as he knew her, Elizabeth had hated everything about doctor appointments and therefore had a habit of avoiding them as much as possible. Henry knew that pushing her too much wasn't going to do any good so he let it go.

A little later Elizabeth was starting to feel better and answered Henrys text message truthfully when she replied that she was doing ok.  
It was already pretty late when Elizabeth got home that day, the kids were already sleeping but Henry had waited for her to come home.  
"You hungry?" he asked after greeting her.  
"Yeees", Elizabeth exclaimed, "I have been craving a P&B sandwich all day long!"  
The moment she said it, Henry and Elizabeth stared at each other.  
"Henry, that's not possible!" Elizabeth said after a few moments passed.  
"It's not?"  
"I… That's…. no", Elizabeth stammered.  
"Nausea, fatigue, cravings for P&B?" Henry summarized what they both were thinking.  
"That just isn't possible", Elizabeth said more to herself than to Henry.  
"But it's not entirely impossible either, is it?"  
"Henry, I have an IUD and I'm 46. I can't be pregnant," Elizabeth hissed. Her heart was beating up to her ears at that point.  
"Oh my god… oh my god", Elizabeth whispered over and over. Her mind was racing as she tried to remember the last time she had had her period. Elizabeth held onto the kitchen counter with shaking hands. Henry got to her side and pulled her into a tight embrace.  
"Babe, it's going to be ok", he whispered.  
"I don't see how", Elizabeth murmured, "where do we even get a pregnancy test from? I can hardly just walk into a store and get one and neither can you."  
"Blake?"  
"I can't ask him to do that", Elizabeth shook his head.  
"Daisy?"  
Elizabeth took a deep breath in. "Yeah, she's probably the best one to ask. I'll call her."

After an awkward conversation and an even more awkward encounter with Daisy, Elizabeth was pacing up and down the bathroom while her husband held the small piece of plastic in his hand that would foretell their future.  
"How much longer?" Elizabeth asked for the tenth time.  
"Thirty seconds", Henry answered.  
"Gosh, Henry, I don't believe this. I'm pushing fifty, we have three almost grown children, I'm the secretary of state and just took a pregnancy test like I'm twenty-something."  
Henry looked up from the test wordlessly.  
"What?" Elizabeth asked with big eyes. She knew the answer though and Henry knew that she knew. Elizbeth sunk onto the bed, her head in her hands. Henry rushed to her side and took her in his arms.  
"This can't be happening", Elizabeth whispered. Her breathing was starting to become labored as her heart started to race.  
"We will figure this out, Babe. You are not alone in this, ok? I'm here, I got you", Henry tried to sooth her but her breathing continued to become more and more labored. Henry let Elizabeth go and placed his left hand between her shoulder blades and gently pushed her forward.  
"Breath, Elizabeth, deep breaths. Come on, you've got this. Deep breath in", Henry took a breath in, "and deep breath out."  
Elizabeth tried to focus on what Henry was saying but her mind kept racing. How was she supposed to do this? How would the kids react, what was she supposed to tell POTUS and her staff? She would have to quit and the media will be tearing her family apart over this. And at her age, there was so much that could go wrong. Not to mention the IUD, it would have to be removed which could likely cause a miscarriage…  
Henry kept pushing Elizabeth down until her head was nearly parallel to her knees.  
"You gotta breath for me, Baby, deep breaths", he kept talking to her and finally Elizabeth was able to gain control over her breathing. It took a while until she was back to normal but the panic attack and what had led to it left her completely exhausted.  
"What are we going to do, Henry? God, what are we going to do…"  
"You are exhausted so right now, we're going to bed and get a goodnight sleep. You have a free morning tomorrow, don't you?" Elizabeth nodded.  
"I'll take my morning off to and then we'll have some time to figure out our next moves. We'll be fine, I promise", Henry persisted.  
"Yeah", Elizabeth took a shaky breath in.

The next morning started the same way the last one did. Elizabeth jumped out of bed, hurried to the bathroom and remained there until the nausea subsided. That day she was in the bathroom alone though, Henry had obviously already gotten up. Elizabeth flushed and slowly got up to her feet when a wave of dizziness caused her to lose her balance. Carefully, Elizbeth sat down on the floor again, hoping that it would past as fast as it had come. At that moment Henry came into the bathroom.  
"Babe, are you all right?" he asked and kneed down beside his wife. Elizbeth had been looking pale the last couple of days but now she was as white as a ghost.  
"Yeah, just dizzy", Elizabeth sighted. They had been through this with all of her pregnancies before. The first three months had been crucial each time, nausea, dizziness and weird cravings accompanying her every step of the way. Henry remembered as well so he calmly got a wet cloth and gently placed it on Elizabeth's back of the neck. He looked at her questioning and she nodded. It had helped all the pregnancies before and it was helping now.  
"OK, I'm good", Elizabeth said after a while and Henry helped her up.  
"You in the mood for breakfast?" Henry asked.  
"Yeah. I'll be down in a minute", Elizabeth nodded.

Half an hour later, the couple was seated on the couch, toast, tea and coffee on a tray between them.  
"How are you feeling?" Henry asked after a few moments of silence.  
"Hm", Elizabeth hummed and it took her a little to find the right words, "I'm overwhelmed. How about you?"  
"Overwhelmed hits the nail on the head…"  
"Yeah", Elizabeth sighed.  
"What do you want to do now?" Henry asked. He wanted Elizabeth to set the pace. He knew that even though he was just as much affected by this unplanned pregnancy as she was, it was her body and she needed to process what was happened in her own rate.  
"I'll need to make an appointment, I think I'll schedule one for next week. That gives us a little time to process before… well, you know with the IUD…"  
"It's likely that you'll miscarriage when they remove it, right?"  
"Yeah", Elizabeth nodded. After Jason was born, Henry and Elizabeth had put a lot of thought into the kind of birth control they wanted to use and had decided that the IUD was the best option. And it was supposed to be more than 99% effective, which had seemed quite promising at the time.  
"We'll just take each day as it comes and deal with whatever lies ahead of us together, all right? I'm here", Henry reassured.  
"Yeah, I know", Elizabeth said.  
"We'll keep quiet until we know more?" Henry asked.  
"I think that would be for the best. There's no point in telling anyone anything as long as we don't know anything for sure."  
Henry nodded and took a sip of his coffee.  
"The kids are already worried about you though. They've noticed that you're not totally fit…", Henry thought out loud.  
"I know", Elizabeth agreed, "but it's only for a couple of days. I'll try to schedule an appointment for Monday, that's only four more days."  
"Okay. I'll go with you."  
"Yeah", Elizabeth smiled weakly.

But everything came different than Elizabeth and Henry had planned.  
It was Saturday night and Elizabeth and Henry were attending an event that Elizabeth would call one of "the things". Without the usual small amount of alcohol in her system, Elizabeth had even more trouble to keep a smile on her face. Not only that she found the people around her straining but she also had a stomach ache that simply wouldn't disappear.  
Henry noticed her strained expression and found an excuse for both of them to disappear in the hallway alone.  
"Babe, are you OK?" he asked her while he placed a hand on her upper back. Elizabeth leaned against the wall of the hallway with her shoulder and nodded.  
"Yeah, I just have a stomach ache."  
"Is it bad? Should we go the hospital?" Henry asked concerned.  
"No, no", Elizabeth shook her head tiredly, "I just want to go home. It feels the same it did with Jason. It's just uncomfortable."  
"Ok. Let's get out of here then."  
"Yeah", Elizabeth gladly held Henrys hands and was relieved when they were sitting it the car. On the way home, Henry was watching his wife closely and wasn't convinced that she was "just uncomfortable". He had seen her in real pain a couple of times before and knew her pokerface well.  
At home Elizabeth went straight to their bedroom while Henry was preparing a tea for her. It was only ten minutes later when Henry walked into the bathroom and found his wife hunched over, holding onto the bathtub with one hand and pressing the other onto her abdomen.  
"Babe," Henry exclaimed and immediately rushed to her side, "what's going on?"  
"Urgh, I don't know. The pain got pretty intense all of the sudden."  
"Come on, lie down", Henry said and helped Elizabeth until she lay on the bed. Henry sat down on the mattress right next to her and Elizabeth took a couple of deep breaths. One hand was resting on her abdomen and Henry laid his hand over hers.  
"What can I do for you?" Henry asked after a while.  
"Could you maybe get me a hot water bottle?"  
"Of course", Henry nodded and a few minutes later he was back with the hot water bottle in his hands. Before Elizabeth placed it on her stomach, Henry helped her out of her dress and into her PJs.  
"Do you need anything else?"  
"No, the warmth feels good" Elizabeth smiled. Eventually she managed to fall asleep but only to be woken up a few hours later by an intense pain in her abdomen and a terrible sickness. She got up as quick and quiet as possible and stumbled into the bathroom. She hadn't even reached the door of the bathroom when a wave of dizziness rushed over her and Elizbeth needed to hold onto the wall of their closet so that she wouldn't fall to the ground. Before she could make another step the pain in her abdomen intensified and Elizbeth hunched over in pain, pressing her right hand into her side while she held onto the wall with the left one and moaned quietly. It was loud enough to wake Henry though.  
"Elizabeth", he burst out and was by her side in seconds, "honey, what's wrong?"  
"I'm not sure", Elizabeth whispered, "but this doesn't feel right anymore, Henry. It really hurts."  
"Ok, all right", Henry gathered his thoughts, "do you feel like you need to throw up or can you walk to the bed?"  
"Bed", Elizabeth replied through clenched teeth. It felt like her stomach was being ripped apart.  
Henry put an arm around Elizabeth's waist and supported her towards their bed. Just when they were about to reach it, everything went black and Elizbeth passed out in Henry's arms.  
"Elizabeth, Baby", Henry exclaimed. He picked her up in his arms and laid her down on the bed. Then he reached for his phone with one hand while the other was constantly caressing her face.  
"Matt, we need to get Elizabeth to the hospital right now", he told Elizabeth's security detail, "she passed out. No, no ambulance, it'll take too long. I'll carry her downstairs, just get the cars ready."  
"OK, come on, Honey, let's get you some help", Henry murmured as he picked Elizbeth up and started carrying her downstairs.  
"Henry", Elizabeth whispered and opened her eyes weakly.  
"Hey sweetheart, it's ok, you're going to be all right. You passed out for a moment but we'll get you to the hospital now, ok? It's going to be ok", Henry reassured while he walked down the stairs. Two security men were already expecting them and held the doors open. Elizabeth nodded faintly.  
"Dad, what's going on?"  
"Oh my god, Mom!"

Henry looked up and saw his two youngest rushing down the stairs.  
"What happened?" Jason asked.  
"Mom passed out, we need to go to the hospital. Allison, call Stevie and tell her to come home, ok? You guys stay here and I'll call you from the hospital."  
"No, we want to come", Jason demanded.  
"We don't have time to discuss this, please just stay here. I will call you as soon as we know something", Henry promised and rushed out the door.  
Just moments later they were speeding towards the hospital. Henry held Elizabeth in his arms. She was becoming paler every second and Henry could tell that she was in pain more and more just by looking into her eyes that were clouded from the pain. It was then when he also noticed that her pajama pants were stained red.  
"We are almost there honey, hang in there. We are almost there."  
Elizabeth winced when the car took a sharp turn and a tear escaped her eye.  
"Don't be scared Baby, it's going to be ok", Henry tried to calm her but the truth was, that he was terrified himself and they both knew it.  
"Henry, the baby", Elizabeth winced.  
"I know, sweetheart, I know", Henry murmured.

Moments later they arrived at the hospital where Elizabeth was already being awaited. Only a few minutes later Henry was holding his wife's hand while she was being examined, luckily the doctor hadn't sent him out of the room.  
Elizabeth was in and out of consciousness and when she was awake, the pain was so crucial that she barely got a word of what was being said around her. That's why the Dr. Wilder was mostly talking to Henry.  
"Do you see that?" she pointed to the monitor of the ultrasound machine.  
"Yeah", Henry nodded.  
"That's the uterus."  
"Ok?"  
"We should be able to see the fetus but there is nothing to be seen", the doctor had been looking serious before but the look on her face now wasn't a good sign. Henrys heart started to beat faster.  
"What is it?"  
"I'm afraid you wife is suffering from an ectopic pregnancy. The fertilized egg attached itself in the right fallopian tube. I can't say much more, I can't see enough with the ultrasound but we need to get her into the ER right away. The tube has ruptured and started bleeding which needs to be stopped promptly."


	2. Chapter 2

_Thank you so much for taking the time to review on the first chapter, I appreciate it a lot!_

 _There is some fluff and maybe some sadness ahead in this chapter. I guess I just needed some Elizabeth-centric hurt &comfort! Tell me what you think and since I might write one more chapter for this story, feel free to share any wishes you might have for this story with me. _

_Enjoy :)_

* * *

Suddenly everything got hectic and before Henry knew it, he was pacing up and down the waiting room. He was lost in sorrow about his wife until the ringing of his phone interrupted him. It was Stevie.  
"Dad, what the hell is going on?" a frantic Stevie asked. It took Henry a few moments to find the right words.  
"Stevie, are you at home?"  
"Yes, I came right away after Ali called. What happened, is mom ok?"  
"They are operating right now."  
"What?! Oh my god, dad, can you please say what's going on?"  
"I will, I promise. Part of mom's security detail is on the way to get you right now. They will pick you guys up, all right?"  
"Can't I just drive? It'll be much faster if –"  
"No, I don't want you to drive right now", Henry interrupted her.  
"Dad, you sound really worried. Can't you just tell me what it happening to mom?" Stevie pled.  
"I'd rather tell the three of you in person and at the same time. But everything is going to be all right, don't worry about that, okay?"  
"Ok", Stevie sighed and they hung up.

Half an hour later the kids stormed into the waiting room and embraced their father all at the same time.  
"Dad, what is happening to mom?"  
"Is mom going to be OK?"  
"How is mom?"  
Henry was bombarded with questions from Jason, Alison and Stevie right away.  
"Come on, lets sit down and I'll tell you what I now."

"So, you guys have noticed that mom hasn't been feeling well the last couple of days, right?"  
The three nodded.  
"We found out a few days ago that your mother was pregnant", Henry broke the news carefully. He wasn't sure what to expect from his children.  
"Pregnant?" Ali asked.  
"Yeah", Henry nodded.  
"Gosh, that's so…", Stevie thought out loud while Jason stayed silent.  
"Obviously it wasn't planned and a big shock for your mother and me."  
"Did she miscarry?" Ali cut to the chase.  
"Not exactly but you guys won't have another sibling either. Mom had what's called an ectopic pregnancy. The embryo was attached in a fallopian tube. It was growing there for a couple of weeks but eventually got too big and the tube ruptured. That rupture caused the pain mom was in tonight and also some heavy internal bleedings. That's why she needed to be operated right away, they need to stop the bleeding and remove the ectopic pregnancy and try to repair the tube", Henry tried to explain as understandable as possible.  
"Try to repair?" Stevie asked.  
"Yeah, it might be too damaged. In that case they would have to take it out."  
"But Mom is going to be ok, right?" Jason finally spoke.  
"Yeah buddy. The doctor said that we luckily got to the hospital pretty fast after the tube ruptured. We'll need to take good care of Mom for the next weeks but once she is out of surgery, she should start to feel better."  
"Ok", Jason nodded and Stevie laid an arm around her younger brother which he untypically accepted.

"Dr. Mccord?"  
Henry looked up and saw Elizabeth's doctor walking into the waiting room.  
"How is she?" Henry asked right away. Dr. Wilder got seated in front of Henry.  
"The surgery went well. We got the bleeding under control and removed the ectopic pregnancy. Due to the bleeding we had to make a bigger incision than we would have liked and also had to remove the fallopian tube, the damage was too severe. She lost a lot of blood, so we gave your wife a blood transfusion."  
"So, she's going to be OK?" Henry needed to make sure.  
"I'm very positive, yes. She'll need some time to recover but we can talk about that in the next days. I'm sure you all want to see her now?" the doctor smiled at the four and everyone nodded.  
"She isn't awake yet but she should start to wake up in the next thirty minutes. She might not know what happened, but that is common so don't worry about that. I will check in with Mrs. McCord in about an hour, so you will have some time with her", the doctor said on the way to Elizbeth's room and Henry nodded.  
Then, finally, they arrived at the room and Henry got to see his wife again.  
Elizabeth looked pale, drained and exhausted, even while she was still asleep. She was supplied with oxygen via a nasal cannula and IV's supplied her with the pain medication and everything else Elizabeth needed on both of her arms. Other then that, Henry and the kids were somewhat relieved to see that she looked pretty unharmed.

It didn't take long until Elizabeth started to shift in her hospital bed. She groaned and her hand wandered up to her face where she tried to remove the nasal tube with her eyes still closed.  
"Baby, hey. Leave that in, honey", Henry murmured and gently took her hand into his.  
"Henry?" Elizabeth whispered hoarsely.  
"Yeah, I'm here", Henry reassured and Elizabeth's eyes started to flutter open.  
"Hey", she smiled weakly.  
"Hey", Henry smiled back.  
Her eyes wandered from Henry to her kids who were standing around her bed.  
"Kids", Elizabeth whispered.  
"We're here, Mom", Stevie replied and carefully squeezed her mother's hand. Elizabeth nodded faintly.  
"We're all here", Henry said.  
"What happened?" Elizabeth finally asked, "The baby?"  
"I'm so sorry, honey. You had an ectopic pregnancy. That's why you were in so much pain. Your fallopian tube ruptured because the embryo became too big. You had some severe internal bleedings so they had to reopen your cesarean scar and remove the pregnancy and the tube", Henry tried to break the news as gentle as possible.  
Elizabeth nodded bravely but a tear escaped her eye which Henry gently stroke away with his thumb.  
"You're going to be ok though."  
Elizabeth nodded again. The room was quiet for a while.  
"Do you want some water, Mom?" Alison interrupted the silence.  
"Yeah, please", Elizabeth said still with a raspy voice.  
Alison filled a cup and Elizabeth took it with shaky hands. She nipped a little on the water which felt good as it ran down her dry throat.  
Then the doctor came into the room.  
"Madam Secretary, it's good to see you awake", the doctor smiled.  
Elizabeth was still immensely drowsy from the anesthetics and the pain medications so she only smiled weakly with her eyes half closed. The doctor took her time to explain Elizabeth everything that has happened.  
"How could this have happened at all?" Henry asked.  
"Well, there are two major factors that contributed to it. First is actually the IUD you had, Mrs. McCord. In the case of a pregnancy despite an IUD the risk of an ectopic pregnancy is pretty high. The other factor was your age. The risk sadly raises with the age", Dr. Wilder smiled compassionately.  
"So, it was pretty much just bad luck", Elizabeth murmured. The conversation had taken all of her energy and she was just minutes away from falling asleep.  
"I suppose you could say that, yes. The good thing is, that you got to the hospital quickly and that we were able to get you back on track, Mrs. McCord. With a rupture like that, the outcome could have been entirely different", Elizabeth nodded and Henry gently squeezed her hand. He didn't even want to think about the other possibilities.  
"Now I suggest that you all get some much-needed sleep and I will see you tomorrow", Dr. Wilder smiled.  
Henry sent the kids home and got comfortable on the visitor's bed. There was no way he was going to leave his wife that night.

Hours later, he was awoken by the sound of Elizbeth's voice. When he opened his eyes, he saw that a nurse was currently taking care of Elizabeth's IV. Before Henry was up on his feet, the nurse had already left the room.  
"Morning, babe", Henry smiled and sat down on Elizabeth's bed.  
"Morning", Elizabeth replied and gladly returned Henry's gentle kiss.  
"How are you feeling?" Henry asked.  
"A little groggy and sore but I think they've got me on pretty intense pain killers, I feel a bit high", Elizabeth smiled a little.  
"Well, your body has been through a lot, I think you deserve to feel a little high for a while", Henry chuckled and gently brushed a strand of hair out of her face.  
"Did you get some sleep?" Elizabeth asked.  
"Yeah, one of the perks of you being the Secretary of State is definitely luxurious hospital rooms!"  
"I'm glad", Elizabeth smiled.  
"Did you let my staff know that I won't be coming in for a couple of days?"  
"Of course. They are sending you their wishes and are already eager to visit you", Henry smiled.  
"Thank you", Elizabeth answered and closed her eyes again. She was feeling so tired, she felt like she could sleep for days.  
"Get some sleep, babe", Henry whispered and placed a kiss on her forehead.  
A little while later the kids arrived at the hospital again and brought everything Elizabeth needed from home and also a set of new clothes for Henry. He took the time to take a shower in the adjoined bathroom while Elizabeth was still asleep and couldn't stop the tears of relieve, sorrow and sadness from falling. Seeing his wife in so much pain, watching the blood staining her pants into a deep red and not knowing what was happening to her had left their marks on Henry. He felt much better after the shower, even shaved real quick and then put on the fresh clothes.

The McCords spent a very quiet day together as a family. They stayed by Elizabeth's side, who was sleeping most of the time. Sensing, that her family was with her was giving her the peace she needed to leave her eyes closed.

When Elizabeth woke up the next day she started to feel more alert. She was able to get down some breakfast which was the first solid food she had eaten since days. Afterwards she asked Henry to help her to get out of the hospital gown and into her own clothes. Dr. Wilder had said that that would be fine now since they were able to remove all the tubes that had been attached to Elizabeth. Only the peripheral intravenous catheter was left in place because it would still be used to supply her with the medications she would need for the next couple of days.  
"Sure", Henry nodded. He got the pajama pants out of the bag the kids had packed and Elizbeth's favorite, very cozy grey sweatshirt.  
"Those OK?" he asked as he held both items up.  
"Yeah", Elizabeth nodded.  
Henry pulled back the bedsheets and took Elizabeth's hands. With the support of his gentle pulls, Elizabeth got into a seated position. She could feel the incision sting and winced. Henry looked at her questioning and Elizabeth nodded. She wanted to get out of the gown.  
Henry took Elizabeth legs and helped her move so that her naked legs were dangling of the bed. He pulled the pants up as far as he could without Elizabeth standing up. Then he took her elbows and supported her while she got to her feet.  
"Gosh, I feel like a hundred", Elizabeth said on wobbly feet.  
"Well, you just had severe surgery, Babe. I think you're entitled to feel a little off", Henry smiled and very gently pulled the pants all the way up while Elizabeth held on to his shoulders. He was careful not to place the waistband over the incision and looked up at Elizabeth with a questioning look on his face. She understood: "Can you leave it under the incision?"  
"Yes", Henry nodded and let the waistband go.  
"Ok?" he asked and Elizabeth nodded. With Henry's help she sat down on the bed again and Henry untied the strings at the back of the gown and took it off. It was the first time since the surgery that Elizabeth and Henry saw the extent of the operation. From her bellybutton down, Elizabeth's stomach was bruised and swollen and the bandage over the incision stood in sharp contrast to her battered skin. Elizabeth started to tear up all of a sudden and while quickly helping her into the sweater, Henry said calmly: "Talk to me, babe."  
"I don't even know what to say", Elizabeth sniffed, "this all just seems so unreal but seeing this", she motioned down to her abdomen, "it makes it much realer."  
"Yeah, it does, doesn't it", Henry smiled sadly. He pulled the bedsheets over her legs and then gently stroke his hand up and down her thigh.  
"You know, I was so scared when we thought that I was pregnant. I didn't think we could do it, I didn't think I could do it. I can't say that I was happy about it, that's for sure. But now… I don't know, I just can't help but feel sad", the tears kept rolling down her pale face.  
"That's ok, honey. You can be sad, even if you weren't happy when we found out about the pregnancy. I'm sad too."  
"You are?"  
"Of course. I haven't even gotten around the idea of having another McCord in the family and there was always the risk of a miscarriage in my head because of the IUD. But I suppose we both subconsciously loved that baby we thought you were carrying the moment you took the test."  
Elizabeth nodded: "Yeah. I guess so."  
"Now you are in pain, you are exhausted, your body has been through so much and on top of that you need to process this loss. You have every right to feel whatever you feel."  
Henry knew from experience that it was a tightrope walk with Elizabeth and her emotions. If he pushed her too far she would shut him out entirely and if he didn't push her at all the risk was high that she would try to ignore her feelings altogether, just like she did after Iran.  
When Elizabeth started to sob, Henry sat down right next to her and embraced her gently. With her head on his chest, Elizabeth let the tears flow and it took her a while until she stopped crying. With sleepy eyes she looked up at her husband who placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Elizabeth cuddled up to Henry's chest again and was asleep in his arms only seconds later.  
Later that day visitors started to come and go and Elizabeth's hospital started to look like a flower shop. POTUS had been there with his wife and made Elizabeth promise him to take all the time she needed to recover. The staff had come together, they reassured Elizabeth that they had things under control and Daisy promised Elizabeth that the actual reason why she was in hospital wouldn't get out in the world. Will had called and was about to book a flight any minute since he was out of the country at the moment but Henry promised him that that wasn't necessary and that they would update him every day. Isabel had announced a visit for the next day and dozens of friends and family called and texted but Henry did the replying since Elizabeth was still beat, in pain and tired.

Dr. Wilder checked in with her patient that afternoon.  
"How are you feeling?" she asked before starting the examination.  
"Pretty sleepy and sore but otherwise ok", Elizabeth answered truthfully.  
"How's the pain?"  
"Tolerable, if I don't move too much."  
"Tolerable is good for now", Dr. Wilder nodded, "we'll keep the dosage of your pain medication the same at least until the day after tomorrow and then see if you feel all right if we start to decrease it."  
Elizabeth nodded.  
Dr. Wilder took a look at Elizabeth's abdomen and incision.  
"It's looking good", she smiled and Elizabeth snorted slightly. For what she had seen earlier that day, her stomach looked more like a battlefield than "good".  
"Don't forget that your body has just been trough a pretty intense ordeal", Dr. Wilder tried to cheer Elizabeth up, "the swelling will go down in the next couple of days and after that it's only a matter of days until the bruises will fade. In a good week the stiches will be able to be removed and you'll look as good as new."  
"Yeah", Elizabeth smiled a little.  
"Do you have any questions right now?" the doctor asked.  
"When can I go home?"  
"If your recovery stays smoothly, I have a good feeling about releasing you in two, maybe three days. You'll need to stay on bedrest for some time but you don't need to be in the hospital for that."  
"That's great", Elizabeth sighed and Henry squeezed her hand. He knew how much she wanted to go home but as much as he wanted that to, he was a little concerned that Elizabeth wasn't going to give herself the time to heal she needed when she got back home.  
"And how long will it take for me to go back to work?" Elizabeth carefully asked. She knew Henry didn't want to hear a word about her work right now but reality was, that she was needed at her desk, so to speak.  
"That's hard to say right now. Under the circumstances I would usually advise to stay at home for at least six weeks", the doctor replied.  
"Six weeks", Elizabeth exclaimed.  
"I know your job is important and that there is hardly someone that can replace you right now. But any form of surgery is a huge event for your body to cope with. It directs all its immune system resources to heal your wounds. On top of that, you lost a major amount of blood which also has a great impact on your body, even with the blood transfusion you've got. That alone will take a lot of energy from you and will likely leave you feeling tired and worn out. You will unfortunately feel some pain and discomfort for quiet some time as your body continues to heal, not only because of the ectopic pregnancy but also because of the surgery – the scarring can result in an additional abdominal pain. Your body will need as much rest as possible in order to get over that. And then there is the emotional trauma I'd like to point out", Dr. Wilder tilted her head and compassionately squeezed Elizabeth's hand, "don't underestimate what you've just been through. I highly recommend to take your time and listen to your body. I advise to start working again slowly, maybe from home for the first weeks. A couple of hours of paperwork here and there in maybe one or two weeks from now shouldn't be too harmful. Just take your time and take care of yourself."  
"'kay", Elizabeth sighed. Though her instincts usually told her to power through whatever it was that she needed to get over, Dr. Wilder's words stuck with Elizabeth and the extent of what had happened to her started to become clear to Elizabeth.  
"I will check in with you again tomorrow, all right?" Dr. Wilder asked.  
"Yes, thank you", Elizbeth nodded.  
"Of course", Dr. Wilder smiled and left the room.

Before the kids got back into the room, Henry sat down on Elizabeth's bed and took her hand into his.  
"You OK?" Henry asked.  
"Yeah. I think I'm slowly starting to process what happened. It's tiring."  
Henry leaned towards Elizabeth so that they were able to kiss.  
"How about you? You OK?" Elizabeth asked.  
"Yeah", Henry nodded but Elizabeth didn't buy it. She had noticed the worried look on Henry's face.  
"What's wrong?" Elizabeth asked.  
"Nothing is wrong", Henry reassured, "I just want to make sure that you are going to take all the time you need to recover. If you get to go home, that doesn't mean that you get to work from bed or set up an office for Blake in our bedroom, right? You heard Dr. Wilder, bedrest, no work, just healing. Physically and emotionally, Elizabeth," Henry smiled with his head tilted.  
Elizabeth couldn't help but smile. Though she didn't want Henry to worry so much, she did find it touching at the same time.  
"I'll take my time, I promise."  
"Good", Henry nodded and kissed her. Then the kids came into the room with bags of food in their hands. Ali got comfortable at the end of Elizabeth's bed while everyone else sat down in the chairs around her.  
"What did the doctor say?" Ali asked between two bites of her salad.  
"I might be able to go home the day after tomorrow", Elizabeth smiled.  
"That's great, Mom", Stevie said and her mother nodded.  
"Yeah, I can't wait", Elizabeth replied.  
"Well set up the PlayStation in your bedroom", Jason planned, "I'll make you a pro in no time, Mom."  
Elizabeth chuckled: "Sounds like a plan, Jase."  
After another spoon full of her soup, Elizabeth set the bowl aside and yawned. While her family kept chatting, she fell asleep again and didn't even notice when the kids left for that day. It was already pretty late when she was woken up by another check in from a nurse.  
When she left the room, Elizabeth looked over to Henry who held a book in his hands and was sitting in the chair right next to Elizbeth.  
"Henry, go home. I'll be fine and you look like you could use a good night sleep in your own bed", she practically begged.  
"So could you", Henry smiled.  
"That's different", Elizabeth sighed.  
"Babe, I'm fine. I'm not going home without you."  
"I would feel better if I knew that you would get some real rest though."  
"Elizabeth, stop discussing please. I'm staying."  
"You're so stubborn", Elizabeth groaned.  
"You would do the same", Henry smiled. He put the book aside, stood up and sat down on Elizabeth's bed and kissed her on her forehead. Then he took her left hand into his and paused for a moment. Something was missing. _Oh, right. The rings_ , Henry remembered.  
"What is it, Henry?" Elizabeth asked.  
"They had to take your rings of when you were in surgery", Henry explained while he looked for his wallet where he had put the rings.  
"Oh, I haven't even noticed yet", Elizabeth shook her head.  
"I'm not surprised, honey. You have been pretty drugged the last couple of days", Henry chuckled.  
"Here", he said and sat down on her bed again with the rings in his hand.  
Elizabeth held out her left hand and Henry slid the rings over her delicate ring finger. The rings were a little lose, a sign that only after a couple of days in the hospital, Elizabeth had already lost some weight.  
"Thank you", Elizabeth whispered and Henry leaned in for another kiss. 

The next day, Dr. Wilder gave Elizabeth the go for taking a shower and starting to walk around a bit and Elizabeth was more than happy about it.  
After showering with Henry's help and putting on a new set of comfortable clothes, Elizabeth started to feel more like herself. The shower had left her completely exhausted though and as soon as she was back in bed, she slept for a couple of hours. When she woke up again, she felt up to playing a couple of board games with her family and was relieved to get the slightest sense of normality. The rest of the McCords felt the same, Henry actually caught himself staring at his wife every once in a while, because he was so glad to see that she was starting to recover.

It wasn't a surprise when Elizabeth was released from the hospital the day after. Dr. Wilder had taken her time to talk to Elizabeth once more about the importance of rest and about the medications she would have to take for a while. Elizabeth also got a good supply of pain medications that was allowed to adjust herself.  
Henry gathered Elizabeth's and his own things and packed the bag while Elizabeth was impatiently waiting. The kids were already at home and prepared everything for Elizabeth's return.  
"Ok, I think we have everything", Henry said after checking the room one more time.  
"Fantastic", Elizabeth sighed.  
Since her abdomen was still sore and in pain, most movements were extremely painful. But Henry did his best to support her in every way she needed so now he helped her out of the bed and into the wheelchair. Elizabeth's security detail took the bags and Henry wheeled her to the car.  
"Lets go home, Baby", Henry smiled when he supported her in the car seat.  
"Yeees", Elizabeth cheered.


	3. Chapter 3

I can't thank you enough for reviewing the last chapter, it means a lot! There is some McCord fluff ahead, I hope you enjoy. It's probably going to be the last chapter.

* * *

When the car pulled into the street where the McCords were living, Elizabeth let out a sigh.  
"Home sweet home", Henry smiled.  
"Yeah. Feels much longer than a few days since I was home last."  
"A lot has happened since."  
"It sure has", Elizabeth agreed and tilted her head so that she and Henry could kiss. Then the car stopped in front of their house.  
"Ready?"  
"Absolutely", Elizabeth nodded. Henry got out of the car, opened the door on Elizabeth's side and helped her out of the car. With small and slow steps, they soon reached the front door and seconds later, Elizabeth finally set food in her home.  
"Mom!"  
"Welcome home!"  
"It's so good to have you back!"  
Her children exclaimed all at once as soon as they noticed that their parents had arrived. After some gentle hugging, Stevie asked: "Are you hungry? We have all of your favorites, waffles, ice-cream, pancakes, you name it."  
"Why don't we make a picnic in our bedroom out of it?" Henry suggested. His actual intent for that question was his wife's tired expression.  
"Yeah", Elizabeth nodded and the children made their way into the kitchen chatting right away.  
Then Elizabeth looked at the stairs. She had never noticed how many of them there were.  
"One step at a time, remember what Dr. Wilder said, climb stairs slowly and pause after every few steps, so that's exactly what we're going to do", Henry said as he saw Elizabeth's look.  
"This'll take me years", Elizabeth murmured sourly.  
"I'd carry you but that might not be the solution either, or what do you think?"  
Elizabeth shook her head: "Thanks babe, but no, I don't think that'll feel any better than just, well, taking one step at a time", she repeated her husband's words smiling.  
Though it didn't take Elizabeth years to get upstairs, it did take her quite some time and she couldn't help but feel a little frustrated about it. In the meantime, the kids had had enough time to prepare everything in their parents' bedroom.

There were trays full of food and drinks, balloons wrapped around the bedposts and flowers on the bedside table.  
"Thank you, kids, this looks great", Elizabeth forgot about her frustration when she got into her bedroom. She immediately got comfortable on her side of the bed and was surrounded by her family in no time. They all found space on the spacious bed and enjoyed the comfort of being all together at home again.  
After a few bites Elizabeth felt the exhaustion from the drive and just let herself drift into a peaceful sleep while being in the safety of her husband's arms and surrounded by her three children. The kids and Henry just let her sleep but stayed in the bedroom. They eventually put on one of Elizabeth's favorite movies and when she woke up again after some time, she gladly watched the rest of it with them. Afterwards, Stevie, Alison and Jason cleared the room and Elizabeth decided to brush her teeth and go to bed for the night. It took her some time to get to the bathroom and with her toothbrush in her hand she sat down toilet lid and started brushing. She looked around the familiar bathroom, took in the homie scent and was once more relieved to be home. That was until her eyes got stuck on the thrash can beside the vanity. It hasn't been used the last couple of days since Henry and Elizabeth had been in the hospital so right on top was still the pregnancy test Elizabeth had taken not so long ago.  
Elizabeth turned off her toothbrush, rinsed her mouth and then just stood there, leaning on the vanity, staring at the can. It seemed like a lifetime ago when she had taken it. Elizabeth replayed the moment in her head again when Henry and she had found out that the test was positive. A wave of shame washed over Elizabeth. She had been so scared back then, so worried about how her life might change. She had thought that she wasn't able to do it. And now, that the possibility was gone, that the pregnancy wasn't any longer inside of her, she suddenly pictured a fourth child. Another person at the dinner table. Another extroversive, strong headed kid, with a kind heart. Another great mind, enriching her life. And she couldn't even be really happy about it back then.

"You OK?" Elizabeth heard her husband's voice and when she lifted her head she saw him leaning in the doorframe.  
"Uh, yeah", Elizabeth nodded hesitantly.  
"You sure?"  
"Yeah, I just", Elizabeth motioned to the trash can and then Henry saw what she meant.  
"Oh right", Henry murmured. He walked over to Elizabeth and gently embraced her.  
"I'm sorry, Babe. I hadn't thought about that", he whispered.  
"I just feel so foolish", Elizabeth admitted, "I never pictured us with a fourth child, not even after the test was positive. I knew the risk of a miscarriage was high because of the IUD and everything. But now… it's like my mind is playing tricks on me and I can't help myself but think about how great that child would have been. You know, even though it was never meant to live."  
"You, Elizabeth Adams McCord are in no way foolish. Everything happened so, so fast the last two weeks, it's no wonder we can't keep up with it mentally."  
"You can't either?"  
"No, Baby, I can't either. You know, when they took you into surgery", Henry sighed, "I was so scared, Elizabeth", Henry paused for a few seconds before he continued.  
"And when we were told that you were going to be all right, I was so relieved, I couldn't put it into words. But at the same time, I felt bad for feeling relieved because we've just lost the idea of an addition to our family we have never planned or even wanted. This is confusing and you and I have every right to feel confused about it – especially you."  
Elizabeth nodded and a single tear escape her eye. She looked up and Henry bend down so that they were able to kiss.  
"Thank you", Elizabeth whispered.  
"There's nothing to thank me for", Henry stroke the tear away with his thumb.  
"Are you ready to go to bed?" Henry asked after noticing that Elizabeth had gotten paler the last couple of minutes.  
"Yes", Elizabeth nodded. Henry put an arm around her waist, Elizabeth laid her head on his shoulder and with time they went back to the bedroom.  
Elizabeth took her medications and was asleep within minutes after that.

After Henry made sure that Elizabeth was sound asleep, he went downstairs to check in with the kids who were still cleaning up the kitchen.  
"Thank you, guys,", he said and put an arm around Ali.  
"Of course," Stevie said and her siblings nodded in agreement.  
"How's mom?" Ali asked.  
"She's doing ok. It's a lot to process, but she'll be fine", Henry smiled and kissed Ali on top of her head.  
"Is there anything we can do?" Jason asked.  
"You're already doing it", Henry said, not without pride.  
"Are you sad, that you're not going to have a baby?" Alison asked and Henry hugged her a little harder. Alison had always been perceptively but the older she got, the more sensitive she seemed to get.  
"Well, you know we obviously didn't plan to have another child. After Jason was born, Mom and I knew that we were complete. So, I'm not gonna lie, when we thought that Mom was pregnant after the test was positive, we were completely overwhelmed and scared. It was totally different to the times we found out about the three of you. There wasn't much room for happiness this time. And then there was also the very high risk of a miscarriage. But before we were even able to wrap our heads around that, we found ourselves in the hospital and, well, you know everything from then on. Now, after some time has passed and we are starting to realize what happened, there is some sadness, yes. It does feel like something we have loved, even if it was only for a short time, was lost. But for me personally the relieve that Mom is home and recovering is still bigger", Henry admitted.  
"I get that", Ali nodded.  
"Yeah, me too", Jason said. Without any words, Jason and Stevie joined the embrace and Henry found himself surrounded by his children.  
"You guys are amazing and everything we could have wished for. Thank you for helping us out so much in this demanding time", Henry murmured.  
"And if there is anything you want to talk about or anything you want to know, just come to us. Talk to Mom or me, OK?"  
"Yeah", "Yes", "OK" the three answered.  
"It was scary", Ali whispered while they were still hugging.  
"Yes, it was", Henry agreed, "but everything is going to be all right now."  
"Thankfully", Stevie sighed and the embrace resolved.  
"Yes, thankfully", Henry agreed and rubbed his eyes with one hand.  
"We'll clean the rest up, go to bed, dad", Stevie said after she noticed the exhaustion in her father's face.  
"You sure?"  
"Go", Jason nodded.

Since it was Friday, everyone was able to sleep in the next day which they could all use. It had been days since Elizabeth had slept as well as that night and was relieved when there was no nurse and no doctor rushing into her room and wanting something from her. Henry got up first and prepared breakfast for the family. He was just about to prepare a tray for Elizabeth when he heard her coming down the stairs.  
"Morning Babe", Elizabeth smiled while pausing on the stairs.  
"Good morning", Henry quickly walked up the steps and gave Elizabeth a hand for the last stairs.  
"What are you doing up?" he asked.  
"I just wanted to find that perfect husband of mine", Elizabeth smiled and Henry chuckled.  
"How about you get comfortable on the couch and then breakfast and coffee will be right up?"  
A little later Elizabeth was seated on the couch, a blanket draped over her, a steaming cup of coffee in her hands and a plate full of pancakes balanced on her legs.  
"You're spoiling me", she sighed in between two sips of coffee.  
"You're supposed to be spoiled. Now more than ever", Henry smiled. Then the kids got up and joined their parents in the living room. Still in their pajamas the McCords decided to turn the PlayStation on and the next hours were filled with laughter, bantering and competing. It was after midday when Elizabeth decided to take a shower.  
"Need any help?" Henry asked and Elizabeth hesitated for a moment.  
"Maybe with changing the bandage?"  
"Sure", Henry nodded.  
They went upstairs together and Henry got everything Dr. Wilder had given them to change to bandage.  
"You want to shower first?" Henry asked.  
"Yeah, I'll just put a waterproof bandage over it", Elizabeth nodded and started to get undressed.  
"Mind if I join you?" Henry asked with a twinkle in his eyes that made Elizabeth laugh out loud.  
"That depends."  
"Depends on what?"  
"I get to determine the water temperature!"  
"You always do, Babe", Henry played outraged.  
"But you always complain that you can't breathe because of the steam."  
"I'll keep my mouth shut", Henry promised.  
"Well, in that case Dr. McCord", Elizabeth smiled and motioned to the shower. They both knew that Henry mostly wanted to join Elizabeth because he wanted to be there in case she needed help but it felt good to joke around a little.

A while later, Elizabeth was lying on the bed and Henry was starting to peel the bandage off. Henry noticed that the bruises from the surgery on Elizabeth's stomach weren't as dark anymore and that the swelling was almost completely gone.  
"Say something if I'm hurting you, ok?" Henry asked.  
"I'm fine, it's not as tender anymore", Elizabeth answered.  
"It's looking better", Henry stated when the Band-Aid was off. Elizabeth lifted her head from the pillow to take a look.  
"Gosh, this remembers me so much of when Jason was born", Elizabeth said at the look of her healing incision.  
"Yeah, it's just a little bigger, isn't it?"  
"Maybe a little", Elizabeth shrugged as she laid her head back onto the pillow.  
"kay, you are all set", Henry said after a while and lifted his head, only to see that Elizabeth had fallen asleep again. He kissed her gently on the forehead, laid the sheets over her resting body and turned the lights off.

Hours later, Elizabeth woke up disorientated. It took her a while to realize that she was in her own bed at that it was only a little after 6pm. Elizabeth turned her bedside lamp on and carefully sat up. It took her some time to get comfortable and when she finally did, Elizabeth took a deep breath in and out. She allowed herself to just let her thoughts run wild for a moment and stared into the nothingness. She thought about the births of her three children, about how happy she had been. She thought about the many conversations she and Henry had had about the possibility of a fourth child and about the day all three of them had had the stomach flue and Elizabeth and Henry decided that three was more than enough. She thought about how small, how very, very small the possibility for her to become pregnant at 46 had been and how it somehow happened anyway. And then she thought about how relatively small the risk of an ectopic pregnancy had been. But it happened. Both of those things happened and it just didn't seem fair. They hadn't even tried to have a baby, she had had the IUD for years, so, if there was a God somewhere, _why did I have to become pregnant anyhow_ , Elizabeth asked herself bitterly. Emotions started to overcome her out of the blue and once again, Elizabeth started to tear up. _I don't even have a reason to feel sad about this, I never wanted it, it was never meant to be,_ Elizabeth tried to stop the tears from falling but she failed. They kept coming, rolling down the sides of her face and though it hurt her abdomen, Elizabeth started to sob. With her face buried in her hands, blond hair falling in front of her face, Elizabeth just sat there, in her bed and cried.

It was Stevie, who entered her parent's bedroom after she had heard her mother's sobs. The rest of the family was still downstairs, thinking that Elizabeth was still asleep and Stevie had wanted to get a charger for her phone out of her room when she heard Elizabeth crying.  
She opened the door carefully and quietly walked to the bed. She sat down next to her mom, who hasn't even looked up yet, and pulled her into a gentle hug. Still with her head in her heads, Elizabeth continued to cry for a little while but eventually calmed. Stevie handed her a tissue which Elizabeth gratefully took.  
"I'm sorry, honey", Elizabeth said after taking a deep breath.  
"Why?" Stevie smiled compassionately.  
"I'm supposed to hold you, when you're crying, not the other way around", Elizabeth smiled faintly.  
"Well, I think I'm old enough to switch places when needed."  
Mother and daughter where now sitting closely next to each other, leaning on the headboard of the bed.  
"How are you feeling, Mom?" Stevie asked after a while.  
"I'm OK."  
"No, I mean, how are you _really_ feeling", Stevie repeated her question.  
"I'm _really_ OK", Elizabeth persisted at first but then she said: "at least, considering everything. It's not easy for me to wrap my head around everything that happened and being alone… well, it just kinda hit me, you know?"  
Stevie nodded.  
"But I am feeling much better already", Elizabeth smiled and now laid an arm around her daughter who rested her head on her mother's shoulder.  
"I'm glad. I was really scared, Mom", Stevie admitted.  
"Oh, I believe you sweetie and I'm so sorry you had to go through that. But I'm really fine", Elizabeth reassured.  
"And I am so proud of you, for handling everything so wonderfully around here while your dad and I couldn't."  
"Thanks, mom", Stevie said and a tear escaped her eye. It didn't get unnoticed by Elizabeth and she held her daughter a little closer than before. They sat like that for a while without saying anything until Henry entered the room.  
"Hey you two", he murmured. It was clear that Elizabeth and Stevie weren't having a cheerful conversation so Henry sat down on the bed, right next to Elizabeth and was able to pull both her and Stevie into his arms. He didn't need to ask what was going on, he just held them both which was the only thing he could do for them at that moment.

The next day, as it appointed, Elizabeth's OB-GYN Dr. Morgan came by to check on her recovery. Henry greeted her at the door. She had been Elizabeth's doctor for many years now, she had been there when all three of the children were born so Henry knew her to and they had a trusting relationship.  
"How's she doing?" Dr. Morgan asked after a while.  
"She's definitely recovering but I think this whole ordeal has left a bigger impact on her than she is admitting to herself", Henry replied.  
Dr. Morgan nodded: "Recovering physically is one thing but recovering emotionally is a whole other thing that gets frequently underestimated."  
Henry led her into the living room where Elizabeth was lying on the couch.  
"Hey there", Dr. Morgan said when she saw Elizabeth.  
"Hi, Dr. Wilder, thank you for incuring the drive over here", Elizabeth smiled.  
"Of course! How are you doing?" the doctor asked. She sat down at the end of the couch and put the doctor's bag she was carrying on the ground.  
"I'm doing OK", Elizabeth replied.  
"That must have been quite a shock", Dr. Morgan stated attentively.  
"I would lie if I'd say that it wasn't", Elizabeth smiled wryly.  
"Is the pain from the surgery getting better?"  
"Yeah, it is, though it feels like it's stagnating a bit now."  
"That shouldn't be anything to worry about. Your body will simply take the time it needs. You might not feel any pain one day and a lot more on another one. Just listen to your body", Dr. Morgan suggested and Elizabeth nodded though hearing over and over again that she should listen to her body was starting to get on her nerves.  
"And how are you doing emotionally?" Dr. Morgan knew about Elizabeth's experience with PTSD after Iran and after what she had heard from Henry, she wanted to make sure that her patient was on the right track to recovery.  
Elizabeth shrugged her shoulders slightly: "Mostly OK", she didn't feel like going into her feelings at this point.  
"Mostly?" Dr. Morgan pushed her gently.  
"Well, I get sad or angry from time to time, but I guess considering everything, that shouldn't be too abnormal."  
"Not at all. You have every reason to feel angry and sad. Besides, your body's hormonal balance has been in flux. That can influence your emotions a lot and even lead to depressive symptoms. It can also lead to dizziness, have you experienced any of that?"  
"I have had some dizzy spells, before and after the surgery", Elizabeth nodded.  
"All right, keep a close eye on that. If it doesn't get better within the next week, we should do some more tests", Dr. Morgan said and then examined Elizabeth.  
"You're healing nicely", the doctor said satisfied after the examination and packed her bag.  
"Good", Elizabeth sighted.  
"Keep changing the dressing every day. I will come by in three days and then the stiches should be able to come out."  
"Ok, great", Elizabeth said while she pulled her shirt down.

"Whenever you feel like it, you could start to go for little walks. I'm sure you are eager to get out of the house", Dr. Morgan knew her patient.

"Gosh, yes, I can't wait!"

"You just need to take it very, very slow. Even if it's frustrating, a couple of minutes at the beginning should be enough. Go slow, don't strain yourself, don't do it if you feel any pain or dizziness", the doctor instructed and Elizabeth nodded.

"Call me anytime if your pain gets worse or if you have any questions, all right?" Dr. Morgan asked. "I will, thank you", Elizabeth smiled. Henry had given Elizabeth some privacy with the doctor, hoping she would feel freer to Dr. Morgan about how she felt. Though Elizabeth and he usually shared everything, sometimes it felt good to talk to someone else.

Henry led Dr. Morgan to the door and afterwards went to the family room where Elizabeth was still lying on the couch, flipping through the channels. When she saw Henry, she turned the TV off and smiled at him.

"Everything good?" Henry asked. He sat down at the other end of the couch, lifted Elizabeth's feet and rested them on his thighs where he startet massaging them gently. "Yep, healing nicely", Elizabeth repeated the doctor's words nodding. "Awesome!"

"Yeah, she also said that I can start to go on little walks if I feel up to it", Elizabeth smiled.

"That's great, babe", Henry beamed. He was so relieved and happy that Elizabeth was recovering so well, he just couldn't hide it.

"It is! And Henry, I was thinking that I would ask Blake if he could bring some of the paperwork that needs to get done urgently tomorrow. I don't think I can stand hanging around all day much longer doing mindless stuff."

Henry laughed out loud. "What?" Elizabeth asked a little confused. She had expected to get the _are you sure, you're up to that already?_ Lecture.

"I'm sorry babe, I have been wondering how much longer you would be able to resist the temptation of calling your staff. But if you feel like you're up to it", Henry shrugged.

"I absolutely feel like I'm up to it", Elizabeth sighed.

"I'm glad you're starting to feel better", Henry said and Elizabeth got a sense of how worried her husband had been.

"Me too", she smiled faintly, "I love you, Henry."

"I love you too."

"Thank you for… well, for being you", Elizabeth smiled and Henry chuckled.

"Any time, baby. Thank you for being you too


End file.
